Here Lies Thomas Jefferson. . . and why not?

As you might remember from class, Thomas Jefferson died on the same day as old friend and formidable opponent... July 4th.  On the fiftieth anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence.  According to legend, John Adams last words were "Thomas Jefferson lives..." Actually, TJ had died a mere few hours earlier.

Jefferson had planned out exactly what his tombstone should look like and exactly what his epitaph would say.  Here's a picture of his grave on his Monticello estate in Virginia.

He included some of his biggest accomplishments.  What did he leave out? Why do you think he left it out?  And by way of comparison, here is the entrance to John Adam's tomb in Quincy, Massachusetts:

Alexander Hamilton Challenges You (and Everyone You Know) To a Duel

OK.  This is not actually true: Alexander Hamilton liked to duel *but* he didn't duel with everyone.  This fake news item form the "historical archives" of the Onion does capture a few kernels of truth necessary to satire and parody.  Can you spot the true bits? If you can, write your response in the comment section.

from The Onion, Oct. 4, 2008, Issue 44-41.

True story.  When many Americans think of Aaron Burr, they think of milk.  Why?  Because of this 1993 "Got Milk?" ad featuring actor Sean Whalen (whom you will recognize from everything).  The ad was directed by. . . Michael Bay (?!)  Incidentally, what would a Michael Bay movie about the duel between Hamilton and Burr look like?